How To Increase Female Desire For Sex

 

 

 

 

Click Above To Discover The Ways To Increase Her Desire For Sex

 

You used to have sex almost everyday. After a while the frequency of intercourse gets lesser and lesser. Even at those relatively rare encounters, it seems to need a lot of coaxing and nudging to get her in bed with you. Does this sound familiar to you? Age, lifestyle, energy level and hormones have great influence on female libido and if one or more of these factors are not functioning well; female sex drive can take a nosedive.

 

The reasons that women may not be enjoying sex are numerous and often complex. Sexual experiences reflect the interaction between the mind and the body. What goes on in a woman’s mind can affect both the sexual and non-sexual aspect of her overall life. Despite the complexity of these issues, you and your woman can still try a combination of ways that will improve her libido and put your sex life back on track.

 

(1)   Be a supportive partner

 

It is very common for women to get stressed from the daily commitments at workplace and home. Taking care of young kids can be both mentally and physically exhausting. Taking care of the house is also a never ending task particularly if she puts heavy emphasis on orderliness and hygiene. When your woman is thinking about work or kids, her mind will be overwhelmed with anxiety that sex is the farthest thing on her mind.

 

Therefore the key to better sex first starts in the mind. Help your woman relax and de-stress so that she is more open to intimacy and sexual intercourse. You will need to help her in managing time at home better. This may involve re-looking the usual ways in doing things such as exploring for ways to simplify things or cutting down on certain tasks, get her to take on activities to de-stress (such as yoga) or give her a hand with household chores (such as cleaning up after dinner). If you have children, get them to bed earlier. At other times, you can get help to look after kids for a few hours while you and your spouse go out.

 

You have to give her some time to release stress so that sex does not become one more chore at the end of the day. Pick a time that both of you have finished with what you are supposed to do so you do not just fall into bed. Turn off the TV or computer at an agreed upon time. The way to get your sex life back to normal is to avoid letting career, housework and child care to take precedence over your sex life. If you can only have sex at the end of the night, you may end up choosing sleep over sex most of the time.

 

(2)   Be patient

 

The slow approach to sexual intercourse works best. This is because a woman’s body does not function like a switch which can be turned on and off immediately. You have to do some preparation work to warm up her mind and body for intercourse. There are various ways to do this which include dirty talking, caressing, holding and touching very inch of her body if you can. Going too soon on genital stimulation is often neither pleasant nor arousing to a woman. This may even create negative feelings, both physically and emotionally. The same logic applies when you touch her breasts too soon.

 

This warming up process does not need to happen only in the bedroom or need to happen only when you want to have sex. This may make it looks too objective-oriented and lack of sincerity to some women. A woman’s sexual desire is very dependent on her state of mind. In your daily life, you have to look for ways and opportunities to build on this good feeling with her. Women yearn for emotional connection more than anything else and you need to do this to get her in the mood. This means treating her with kindness and consideration in and outside the bedroom.

 

(3)   Put importance on clitoral stimulation

 

Again too early stimulation on the clitoris is counter productive because the clitoris is highly sensitive and many women prefer indirect stimulation. This can be done by kissing, licking and caressing around the outside of her vagina which can be very rewarding and enjoyable for her. It is only when she is fully aroused that you can give prolonged and direct clitoral stimulation.

 

The reason why you should pay more attention on clitoral stimulation is because less than 50% of women have orgasm during intercourse itself. The normal missionary position does not normally offer sufficient clitoral stimulation. To increase the chances of orgasm, you can stimulate the clitoris through oral sex, using your fingers to rub on it, using a vibrator and choosing those sex positions that can increase contact with the clitoris.

 

The bottom-line here is to understand what makes your woman feel angry, hurt, insecure dot loved. If you are able to understand what makes her tick sexually and becoming an expert in fulfilling her needs, your woman will regain her sex drive eventually and reach orgasm easily.

 

For more ideas and tips to have a better sex life, you can read on more from Hot Sex and/or Make Her Orgasm

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For Couples Who Are Busy – How To Have Sex

 

 

 

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You use to have lots of energy for fun sex, but those days are long gone and seem so far away. You always feel tired and are not sure how to get your sex life back. So, what can you do?

 

Below are some tips for you to try out.

 

(1)   Find out the real problem

 

Lack of sex because of tiredness happens to most couples and this lack of sexual desire can be due to other factors too. The problem with blaming, ’We are just too tired’ for passing on sex is it is usually a cover for other things that have gone wrong in the relationship such as lack of communication, build-up resentment, boring sex, the list goes on and on. In fact, there are many couples who have great sex lives and have more sex when they are tired because it is their way of relaxing and feeling good. Sex can flood the brain with endorphins and oxytocin, which are hormones associated with pleasure.

 

Instead of focusing on the issue of being exhausted, couples need to look at the bigger picture of how they are having sex. They can jointly come up with more realistic expectations on what is achievable for their present lifestyle and schedule. This can be started with a heart-to-heart talk outside the bedroom like, “We will be quite busy for the next 6 months. What can we do sexually and/or to stay connected even if we cannot have as much sex as we want?”

 

(2)   Set some time apart for sex date

 

If you are one of those so-called dual-income-no-sex (DINS) couples struggling with the daily grind of life, scheduling sex is the easiest way for a couple to keep their sex life on the radar. It may not seem romantic and probably make you feel like failures because you can no longer have spontaneous sex; however chances are if you do not schedule sex, it is not going to happen. The upside to scheduling is it takes away any negative feelings of who is going to initiate sex and wondering if tonight is the night to have sex. Research has proven that couples who schedule sex have more mutually satisfying sex.

 

Rather than going to a dinner or a movie, you can stay at home to have a sexually arousing evening. You can also create windows of opportunity for sexual connection at times other than at the end of a long day. You can also make love when your kids are sleeping or you can have sex in the morning or afternoon. You can also consider that wake-me-up-sex where you welcome your spouse waking you up while you are asleep which can be more arousing because our sex-related hormones are at the highest level of the day at between 8 am to noon. Therefore set your alarm early to enjoy some morning sex.

 

(3)   Just do it

 

If you can just get the ball rolling, momentum will usually take over. It takes a little bit of effort and time to transit out of the overworked and under-appreciated mommy mode into the hot, sexy, loving partner mode. But if you can get past this initial hesitation, your desire will follow. It only takes a little bit of caressing or kissing, maybe a touch here or there to get both of you started. Once you are in the mood, the thought of sleep will be gone. The more sex you have, the more testosterone, dopamine and oxytocin you release.

 

You can try this 10-minute rule. If you are not in the mood or feel too tired for sex, give yourself 10 minutes. According to research, half of the population feels amorous or horny and wants to initiate sex, while the other half is not interested in sex until after they start kissing and fooling around. Therefore give it a try when you feel tired next time. So, try kissing and fooling around for 10 minutes and see if you can get more aroused or interested.

 

(4)   Be a supportive partner

 

You have got to do something to help pick up some of your wife’s daily responsibilities. This will give her a little bit more energy left for her to feel horny and think of some sexy stuff to pleasure and please you. This should incentivize you to be a caring and supportive partner. While one spouse cleans up after dinner, let the more tired one takes a bath, relax or read a magazine or newspaper. If you can allow your partner the time for her to release stress, this will avoid sex from becoming like one more chores to her at the end of the day.

 

You can make things easier with better time management at home. Pick a time that both of you will be finished working so you do not just go straight to bed. Turn off the TV or computer at an agreed upon time. If you continue to let your career or housework to take precedence over your sex life, you are more likely or probably too exhausted for sex. If you can only have sex at the end of the night, you may end up choosing sleep over sex on a regular basis.

 

(5)   Self-seduction

 

Most women need to be stimulated mentally and/or physically before they actually feel turned on. As a woman, you can single-handedly transform your libido by trying self-seduction.

 

Throughout the day, you can conjure up past sexual experiences that really got you work up enough to get you into the sexy mindset. Feeling relaxed is also equally important. After you reach home, unwind with a glass of wine or do something else that will give you a mental break from the stressful things that may be affecting your sex drive.

 

It can be of great help to read a super sexy novel and you can add in self-stimulation if you want to. From this moment onwards, you make sex a top priority. Do not wait until the laundry is done to get down to business or until you collapse into bed, because by then your only desire will be to sleep.

 

Are you really too tired or honestly has sex becomes a little boring or too predictable? Maybe you would be less tired if sex was more fun, novel and engaging. Want to try something new and spice it up? Click on Hot Sex and Fix A Sexless Marriage

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When To Have Sex In Order To Make A Girl Orgasm Fast

 

 

 

 

Have you ever noticed how her libido ebbs and flow at different times? Do you ever wonder why on some nights she is very horny and really wants you, yet on other nights, she needs some coaxing? Do you know that her libido is controlled by her hormones which can fluctuate on a daily basis depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle? Would you like to know the sexual implications about the changes in her hormone levels?

 

One of the ingredients of great sex is it should be mutually enjoyable and fulfilling. It therefore helps a lot that as guys, we should have a good understanding about the hormonal changes happening in a woman’s body and how these can affect her sexual desire.

 

4 Hormones Influencing Her Monthly Menstrual Cycle

 

(1)   Follicle-stimulating hormone is responsible for stimulating the ovarian follicles (the tiny sacs of eggs) to grow.

 

(2)   Estrogen is produced by specialized cells within the developing follicles. When this hormone reaches the blood stream, it will build up the lining of the uterus in expectation of a fertilized egg. It also thins the mucus in the cervix (the narrow outer end of the uterus) to make it easier for the sperm to reach and fertilize the egg.

 

(3)   Luteinizing hormone triggers the egg to break from the follicle (sac). It also causes the broken follicle to grow new cells that produce the progesterone.

 

(4)   Progesterone causes the lining of the uterus to secrete protein-rich substances for nourishing the egg if it is fertilized. If not, these substances will be drained out of her body together with her menses. This hormone also helps to thicken the cervical mucus to make it more difficult for the sperm to reach the uterus.

 

The rise and fall of estrogen and progesterone seem to be responsible for the shifting physical and psychological sensations many women experience in their monthly cycles. When estrogen is in command (during the 1st half of menstrual cycle), women tend to feel better both physically and emotionally, more self-assured and less irritable.

 

When progesterone is on the rise (during the 2nd half of menstrual cycle), women tend to have more negative feelings such as low esteem, impatience and lethargy. They may also experience more physical ailments such as headaches, swollen ankles and muscle fatigue. Therefore, when she turns down your sexual advance claiming she has a headache, she may not be lying to you. These shifts are tendencies that may not happen to every woman. The intensity of these changes also varies from woman to woman and from month to month for each woman.

 

The average length of the menstrual cycle is 29.5 days. It is normal for women to have a cycle ranging from 15-49 days. Most women’s cycles get shorter as they age, from an average of 35 days during teen years to 28 days by mid-30s. The length of menstruation also varies among women from 2-8 days. A variety of factors can shorten the cycle from month to month, including crash diets, stress, excessive exercise and prolonged use of contraceptive. Some research indicates that a sexually active woman (having sex at least once a week) tends to have a shorter and more regular menstrual cycle.

 

How The 4 Phases Of Menstrual Cycle Affects Female Sexual Desires

 

(1)   Bleeding Or Menstruation Phase (Day Number 1 To 5)

 

The bleeding can last from 2-8 days. A woman may feel depressed and normally little or no sexual activities.

 

(2)   Pre-Ovulatory Phase (Day Number 6 To 14)

 

Estrogen continues to rise and peak on around the 12th-14th day as her body is getting ready to ovulate. The lining of the uterus begins to thicken and cervical muscles get thinner making it easier for the sperm to enter the uterus. During this period, she is feeling confident and is in the mood for romance. The 10th-14th day will be a good time for some long, slow romantic lovemaking.

 

(3)   Ovulation Phase On The 14th Day (Peak Sexual Desire Day)

 

On this day, she is at her peak horniness (if she is not taking birth control pills) with her eggs readies to drop and her testosterone spiking. Men will flirt with her today too, since she is giving off an animalistic level of pheromones. If you want to get her pregnant, today is the perfect day. Today is a great day for quickie sex as she wants you a lot and probably more than once. She is most likely to be multi-orgasmic today, so be sure to satisfy her any way you can.

 

(4)   Premenstrual Phase (Day Number 15 To 29)

 

Within 24-28 hours after ovulation, her body temperature will increase by about 0.5 to 1 degree and stays there for several days. Cervical mucus gets thicker making it difficult for the sperm to enter the uterus. Progesterone continues to rise and peak on around the 22nd day. Some women will have bad mood during this period.

 

However, some sex researchers discover that women have a 2nd stretch of days during this period when they tend to be more sexually active. This resurgence of sexual desire may be caused by the sudden drop in progesterone that occurs after the 22nd day. It is believed that high levels of progesterone suppress female libido so when the level falls, her desire will go up.

 

On a daily basis, the best time to have sex will be between 9 am to 12 noon, when estrogen levels are at the highest. The bad time for intercourse is between 6 pm to midnight when estrogen levels are at the lowest. This is a problem because most working activities are organized in the day time and most people can have sex on evening except on weekends.

 

This implies that for evening sex to be mutually enjoyable, a lot of foreplay (touching, manual and oral stimulation, dirty talking, role playing, sex toys, lubricants) plus patience is needed to get her in the mood. In places that have 4 seasons, female libido is at the peak at around late summer period which explains why a lot of births occur at around early summer.

 

So keep these female sexuality facts in your mind and you should be able to know how best to please a woman at any time during her cycle. Perhaps now you want to know more about how to make her enjoy sex as much as she can even in those less-favored days and if this is the case you can click on Hot Sex and Great Lover

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The Most Common Sexual Issues That Matters To A Lot Of Women

Some societies treat sex as a taboo topic. Such attitude tends to inhibit any open discussion on sexual matters. This can be so stifling that it prevents women from having enough knowledge to improve their sex lives. So, what are the things that most women are keen to know about regarding sexual matters? Read on!

 

(1)   Anything wrong with me?

 

“I am not able to have an orgasm during sex, is that normal?” “I squirt during one of my masturbating sessions, it feels like urinating but I enjoy the feeling, am I weird?” Sex is something that is very personal. Therefore each person will definitely respond in his/her unique way to any particular act of sexual stimulation. As long as your sex life does no harm to anyone and you are not doing anything to put yourself in danger, there is no reason to be concerned about any of your sexual desires, fantasies and responses.

 

If you are not able to have orgasm during sexual intercourse, it has nothing to do with whether you are normal or abnormal. It is more to do with the lack of communication with your spouse about your sexual needs. The first step towards a fulfilling and satisfying sex life is not to be too harsh on yourself and to accept yourself as a normal person with the right to an uninhibited sexual self.

 

(2)   What is the normal frequency of sex?

 

The concern here is you are probably less interested in sex than others. Research has shown that most long-married couples have sex once or twice a week, if either of them does not have any illness, is pregnant or is bothered by other matters that affect the mood for lovemaking. For newly married couples, sex happens more often but tends to decrease in frequency over time.

 

(3)   How to let my husband know what I want in bed?

 

You should not expect your husband to be able to second guess and read your mind all the time. Communication is the key to a healthy and active sex life. You have to speak out and be clear about what you want. The way to do is to package your request in the form of compliment. This will avoid the request becoming like a complaint which can lead to defensive behavior. For example, you can say, “It really turns me on when you touch me there,” or “I love it when you take your time on foreplay.” You can also give him some non-verbal guidance by way of positive feedback such as moaning or moving certain part of your body closer to him when he makes the right move. You can also put across by what you want in a playful manner by way of dirty talking.

 

(4)   Why I lose interest in sex?

 

Loss of libido is a common problem affecting one-third of women. Fluctuating hormone levels due to pre-menopause syndrome, stress from work and household responsibilities, medications (certain contraceptives are linked to low sex drive), etc, are possible causes of your decrease in sexual desire.

 

Check to see if any of these causes are relevant to your situation. If medication is the cause, discuss with your doctor to prescribe alternative drugs. If juggling between household and work duties is too overwhelming, you need to discuss with your spouse about sharing some household responsibilities or getting outside help. At the same time, look for ways to improve intimacy with your spouse and reconnect you with your inner vixen. There are non sexual ways to be intimate such as cuddling, talking, holding hands, watching a movie together or just having a dinner alone. You can try masturbation to uncover certain hidden aspects of your sexuality which can help to reverse the loss of libido.

(5)   How to get over it if my husband/I cheated?

 

To save your marriage, the partner who cheated must make an effort to sever all links with the 3rd party. The unfaithful spouse needs to be honest to own up to his/her mistakes. Make an appointment to visit a family counselor for some therapy sessions to help you find ways to rebuild the relationship. The injured party should be given an outlet for him/her to vent, cry or let go off the hurt feelings for about 10 minutes a day. This will gradually ease the pain after a period of time.

 

(6)   How do I let my spouse know about my fantasies?

 

Indulging in fantasies and sharing them with your partner can lead to hotter lovemaking and greater intimacy. One way to begin is to create a “fantasy box” to list down you and your partner’s sexual fantasy. When things get dull in the bedroom, these fantasy ideas can be put into action. Another way is to share verbally what you want with your partner. Many times, simply talking about what you want can turn you both on so much that there is no hesitation when it comes to acting on it.

 

(7)   How can we find the time for making love?

 

It may seem unromantic to say you need to schedule time for sex. But with life getting busier due to increase responsibilities from workplace and home, sex can gradually be pushed into low priority if there is no attempt to allot time for it. Learn how to say no to some requests for your time. Re-prioritize your activities to free up some time for lovemaking. Make your relationship and your sex life a priority.

 

(8)   How do we spice things up if we are stuck in a sexual rut?

 

To keep sex life exciting and fun, you can inject some novelty by making small changes in routine. Try having sex at different places (at home or outside home such as the back seat of your car or a motel room near your place) and different time of the day. During the lovemaking session, you can incorporate role-playing, oral sex and/or try new sex positions. Try giving each other hot oil massage, using feathers to tickle each other, having sensual bath together, arousing each other in ways other than traditional intercourse.

 

Try to set the mood in advance with proper lighting, proper music, proper food, and proper settings. Make sure that the setting suits your partner’s tastes. You can create the romantic mood at any places in your house such as the living room, kitchen or anywhere you can imagine. Rent romantic or sexy movies. Visual stimulation always works because erotica helps you to get in touch with your deepest, darkest and most sensual fantasies. Visit an adult store for some couple sex toys. Sometimes props can be fun. Never be afraid to try something new.

 

Sometimes it is also a good idea to temporarily abstain from sex. At times, sex may hold a lot of anxieties for certain couples, which can inhibit true intimacy. This can be avoided by simply replacing sex with the relaxing pleasures of cuddling, kissing, massage, or to pursue other activities you enjoy.

 

There are many books that can give you some ideas to help you achieve a fulfilling and satisfying sex life. If you have never thought of buying a self-help book about sex, why not do it now? You may do so by clicking on Sexy Games and Naughty Flirting.

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Causes Of Low Female Libido And How To Overcome This

Low libido in women or low sexual desire is the most common sexual problem affecting at least one-third of women. Some women are much distressed over this loss of libido, feeling as if they are letting their partners down. However there are many things women can do to rekindle their passion and bring pleasure back in their sex lives.

 

What can cause the loss of libido in women?

 

(1)   Psychological issues

 

Fear of pregnancy can hurt sex drive. This is especially so in those Roman Catholic societies where the church frowns on contraceptives and abortion. Problems with physical or mental health, medication, recreational drug abuse, past sexual abuse and daily life stress are other factors.

 

(2)   Negative views on sex

 

Double standards on sex can have a big effect on women’s sexual desire. Men are looked at as studs if they are sexual, but women are still being called sluts. Some of us are being fed with some negative sex beliefs such as sex is dirty or immoral, or should only be used for procreation. All these negative views can kill sex drive.

 

(3)   Biological factors

 

Hormonal fluctuations due to pregnancy, breast-feeding and pre-menopause syndrome can lessen sexual desire. Vaginal dryness which can result from declining estrogen levels can make sex painful and cause loss of libido. Testosterone level also affects libido in women which normally peaks in their mid-20s and declines from there until menopause.

 

(4)   Relationship problems

 

What happens outside the bedroom will eventually set the mood inside the bedroom. Conflict in other parts of the relationship can affect sex life. Differences over monetary matters, child rearing, and relationship with in-laws can result in anger, resentment and cause women to mentally shut out sex.

 

How to rekindle the passion?

 

(1)   Focusing on own needs

 

The thing that can most inhibit desire in women is to be too concerned about others at the expense of own interests and comfort. If women want to enjoy sex and have orgasm, they need to pander to their own needs and to do the things that can pleasure themselves.

 

(2)   Improving intimacy

 

Before looking for ways to spice up sex life, it helps to work on improving the intimate connection first. Studies have proven that a simple touch can help to release endorphins in the brain that not only make us feel loved, but want to give love in return. Surprise her with an unexpected hug, a surprisingly romantic or a naughty tickling.

 

(3)   Injecting some novelty

 

Marriage life inevitably sinks into boredom and hurts libido if both gets too comfortable with routine. Change the place and time to have sex, experience with different sex positions, and create a conducive mood for sex in the bedroom, living room, kitchen or just anywhere you can imagine. Try role playing to be someone or something else, dress up and play sexy games with your partner. Do something different or adventurous outside of the bedroom as well. Consider watching horror movies, riding a roller coaster, or doing bungee jump, trying an exotic cuisine with your partner in a newly opened restaurant.

 

(4)   Stimulating yourself

 

It can be pressurizing for some women to have orgasm with their partners. A way to overcome this is to engage in masturbation. This process can help a woman to discover what and how she can be aroused. After knowing what feels good, you can guide your partner in how he can please you sexually.

 

(5)   Using lubricants

 

If vaginal dryness is a problem, go to a local pharmacy or sex shop where you can choose the different flavors and aromas of lubricants. Applying estrogen cream into the vagina can help to increase vaginal secretions. If possible, you can discuss with your doctor about the options before trying anything.

 

(6)   Having realistic expectations

 

What you often see in porn movies is usually not an accurate reflection of reality and can be exaggerating at times. If sometimes you cannot have orgasm during sex, it can be due to some temporary factors and is not due to your fault. If you are concerned about how you look when naked that you want to make love with lights off, you are probably too harsh in evaluating your own body. Your partner probably finds you more attractive than you think you are. So you should relax, be kinder to yourself, just enjoy the process of lovemaking and gradually your libido will return.

 

(7)   Having a deep conversation

 

You should not expect your partner to be able to read your mind like a book all the time. If you want pleasure during sex, the simplest way is to let your partner knows what arouses you. Put your request in a compliment rather than a complaint. For example, you can say, “It really turns me on when you take your time on foreplay before we have sex.” For discussions on sex, it is better for this to take place outside of the bedroom to avoid been too pressurizing to both sides.

 

All strong relationships require communication, effort and a little commitment to spice things up. If you want help to make your love life interesting and satisfying again, you can click on Hot Sex and Get Her In Mood.

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