For Couples – How To Spice Up Sex And Make It Interesting

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How To Bring The Spark Back


Do you feel that what you are doing in the bedroom is getting to be like a routine rather than sexy and exciting? Are you getting bored with the monotonous same kind of sex every time? Do you want it to be different and exciting so that you can make her horny and beg you for sex?


(1)   Rediscover Each Other’s Sexual Interest


Communication is the key to improving your sex life. Neither one of you can read minds. You have to talk to each other about your likes, dislikes, fantasies, fears and concerns. Sex gets better with intimacy and you can only have intimacy if you speak to one another openly and honestly about anything that is on your mind. This is best done when both of you are not in bed.


Through communication (both verbal and non-verbal) and listening, both of you can come to understand what ignites that spark in each other. That may be cuddling, leaving love notes for your partner to find, meeting at a motel for a tryst, trying out new sex techniques, introducing a vibrator or dozens of other potential turn-ons.


If your partner is reluctant, be patient and try to find out why. Ask your partner if there is a way that you can help him/her to overcome the fear or a way for you to work together to spice up your sex life.


If you can’t find the words to talk to your partner about how to improve sex or he/she is reluctant to talk about it, seeing a counselor may help. A counselor can help to create a safe space for your feelings and thoughts to be articulated in a way that can really do some good for your relationship.


(2)   Treat Your Partner As If You Are Dating


The problem that happens to most long-term relationships is after a while; we get so used to each other that we start to take for granted of each other. We stop trying to show the best part of ourselves to do nice things to flirt and impress each other.


For a woman, dress well, dress sexily (like buying new lingerie). This applies the same to guy. He should continue to pay attention to his attire, his appearance and his body. It will be helpful that both of you can exercise together. The key is to maintain the sexual appeal to each other.


Flirt with each other like you used to do when dating. Experts say flirting sends natural stimulants surging through the body, creating an instant emotional ‘high’ similar to orgasm. Just do those things you used to do to each other when you both start meeting each other.


Remember kissing? It is what you used to do when you first met. Many couples find that kissing stops once the relationship gets going or dwindles to a quick snog before getting down to business. Don’t underestimate the power of kissing. During kissing, testosterone is passed to each other through the saliva. This sex hormone can work wonders to increase your libido. So start kissing as passionately as you did at the beginning of your relationship and it will work wonders for your sex life.


Meet each other directly at the date like you used to. Don’t pick each other up. Meet up at a club and head out to dinner, or do something both of you would like. This will remind you of the good old days when both of you would meet each other outside the house. Make it a regular thing, weekly or bi-weekly depending on your budget and schedules. It may seem like a lot of work, but it will make your relationship stronger and healthier in the long run. The resulting good feeling will most likely be spillover to the bedroom.


(3)   Tease Each Other


Spice up your partner’s day by sending out-of-the-blue racy text messages (otherwise known as ‘sexting’) to get him/her psyched to see you later. Tell your partner how much you desire him/her and what you will do later. This really builds up the anticipation and desire for a night between the sheets.


To turn her on, you need to tease her at the beginning to make her horny and then completely stop. To start, you rub her back gently, brushing your hands over her body. Then you walk away to do other things. After a while, you come back and kiss her slowly and firmly. Run your hands through her hair and then stop. Go and make a drink or flip through a magazine. Next, start to kiss her neck. Stop after a few seconds and do something else. Repeat this act four or five times and she will not be able to resist your charm.


Blindfolding your partner increases her sensory awareness. She does not know where you are or what you are going to do next. This creates anticipation for better sex – the tease her. Tease her mercilessly with sensory objects such as feather or your tongue. Start off softly, as this excites her nerve endings and make them far more sensitive. However, do not overstimulate the nerve endings because after a while the neurons stop firing with such intensity and the sensation becomes numb.


For a woman, she can do a sexy strip tease for him. But if you are too shy to try it, she can have her own version. You just dance for him, making him want to touch you, but never let him. After you have taken off just a few items of clothing, you let him do the rest.


Sex does not necessarily have to be started in the bedroom all the time. To improve your sex life and make it a little different at times, communication is very important, you need to try to behave as if you are still dating and you use some imagination and creativity to tease each other. Use these tips to spice things up and set the mood for great sex.


If you need more tips to make sex fun, click on Fun Games and/or Creative Sex



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