Why She Says No To Sex

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Ever wonder why she is no longer keen to have sex? There could be tons of reasons that affect a woman’s interest in sex. Some factors are obvious while others may not be so. It maybe difficult to pinpoint accurately what the problem is, so here is a list of the possible reasons that maybe affecting her sex drives.


(1)   Experimenting new sexual acts unexpectedly


Some people enjoy rough sex, violent role-playing and even a little bit of pain, while others can find this disgusting. For example, some women may not like the idea of anal sex. While it is fine in trying new things to spice up your sex life, it can be a turn off if you do not first try to find out how comfortable she is on your new suggestions. If you want to explore new sexual possibilities with her, it is a lot easier if you both agree that you can ask for anything as long as you ask nicely, you have enough knowledge (such as precautions and ways to avoid painful anal sex), you have clear reasons for trying something new and most important to take no for an answer.


(2)   Perverted dirty talk


Most of us can appreciate a little dirty talk. When you get high, all kinds of things can come out of your mouth. First you whisper a fantasy in her ear, then you get too carried away going into too much psycho detail and before you can go any further, she suddenly finds some excuses to turn down your sexual advances. If you want to avoid scaring her in bed, keep these psychopathic little tales to yourself.


(3)   Psychological issues


Confidence and stress are both major obstacles to a healthy sex life. She has bad self-image such as feeling her body is no longer as curvy as before especially after childbirth. The best thing you can do is to reassure her that she is desirable. Find something good about her and remind her how great she is as often as you can. If she is stressed, giving her a relaxing massage and a little bit of pampering will be a great help.


Besides confidence issues and stress, feeling anxious about sex due to various reasons (probably due to childhood abuse, rape or other fears) can hurt her sexual desires. She needs to find out the reasons for her anxiety and to overcome them and the best thing you can do is to be supportive. Of course, this will take time, but with patience and good communication, this can be dealt with and eventually resolved.


(4)   Emotional matters


She is very dissatisfied with you probably feeling that you neglect her. The only thing you can do is to find out the reasons and to think of some kind of adjustments you can make. She is trying to assert herself. She behaves in this way to compensate her sense of helplessness in other aspects of her life such as she has a nasty boss, a dominating close friend or an overprotective mother. The way to overcome this is to compliment on her sexual abilities and prowess. If you can acknowledge how much you appreciate her in bed, she may realize that trying to prove her status is not necessary.


She wants to manipulate you. There are a few options here: give her what she wants, give her something similar to what she wants, reason with her, wait it out (in the mean time, you gratify yourself) until she returns to her senses. She is bored. In this case, you can take her to a sex shop and get anything that is fun for both of you. Get a self-help book on how to spice things up. She is or maybe cheating. This is quite serious and after knowing the reasons for cheating on you, you have to decide for yourself if you want to forgive her or to move on.


(5)   Lack of exercise


Women who often exercise tend to have higher sex drives and their periods less painful and pre-menstruation syndrome less severe or obvious. This is because the small chemical and hormone changes as a result of regular exercise can deliver the desired effect (such as preparing her body for pregnancy) instead of disrupting the chemicals in the brain that do damage to her mind and body. What you can do here is to suggest some physical activities you can do together such as jogging, rollerblading, cycling, rowing boat, playing tennis or ballroom dancing.


(6)   Pre-menstruation syndrome


This can affect her for days before her period. Her stomach gets bloated, she experiences cramps and her mood swings as unexpectedly as the weather. The best thing to do is to pretend you are deaf and avoid arguing back and at the same time encourage her to do some exercise and any other stress-relieving activities, but not sex of course.


(7)   Unhealthy diet and lifestyle


Eating too much junk food can first cause overweight and the chances of contracting all kinds of chronic illness (such as diabetes, hypertension). Needless to say, this can affect sex drive. Unhealthy habits such as smoking and taking party drugs (such as ecstasy pills) can in the long run damage both health and sex drives. Some women can get irritated if you lecture them about proper diet and healthy lifestyle. The best way you can do in this case is to practice what you preach and let her learn by your example.


(8)   Medication



Birth control pills which can inhibit the production of estrogen and certain prescription drugs (such as those for high blood pressure) can curb sex desire. A way to handle this issue is she can talk to the doctor to prescribe alternative drugs.


(9)   Certain illness


Problems with the thyroid and adrenal glands and the removal of the uterus can lower her testosterone (sex hormone). In this case, she has to consult her doctor to come out with options that she can help to regain some of her sex drives.


Knowing what turns her off is the first step towards improving both you and her sex life. If you want to know what and how you can turn her on, you can check this out at Hot Sex and All That She Wants

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