You Want More Sex Than What You Have With Him Now, What Can You Do?





Your husband feels that having sex once a week is enough. But you want more. It is very normal for couples to have different levels of sex drive. This in itself is not a problem. The big problem is how to deal with the situation in ways that can meet both people’s needs.


Possible reasons for his low sexual desire could be biological, medications (such as anti-depressants), heart diseases, performance anxiety, emotional (such as loss of job), fluctuation of sex-related hormone (testosterone) and relationship issues.


If a man is not interested in sex, it does not mean he must be suffering from sexual dysfunction which contributes to a drop in desire. Most of the time, the real reason men do not want to have sex are very similar to the reasons that women do not want to have sex. These could be due to underlying, unresolved relationship problems. One of the biggest complaints among men is that their wives are critical or nagging, which can hurt a guy’s sex drive. Many men (similar to women) really need to feel emotionally connected to their wives in order for them to want to be sexual.


When face with a husband who is less interested in sex, women normally think something must be wrong with them, they are not attractive or loveable, or this could be due to their physical appearance. Could this be the real reason? The answer is both yes or no.


Most of the time is no and could be his problem such as stress, tired and the reasons just stated. At other times, this can be a real issue. A lot of men complain that their wives do not eat well, do not exercise or do not pay attention to their appearance. Men are more visually oriented when it comes to arousal. If women really want their husbands to be more interested in them, they should pay more attention to how they are taking care of themselves physically.


Communication is most important in every relationship. Frustration builds up when a couple is not able to communicate about problems, desires, fears or a host of other regularly unspoken issues that impact their sexual experience and overall relationship. Communication allows difficult topics to be openly discussed. Tell each other what you like about your sex life, what acts are more fun and what turns both of you on.


When couples are able to convey their feelings to each other without intimidation, worry of reprisal, or embarrassment, they are able to relate to one another within a context of acceptance. This often requires learning better communication skills. It is also important for couples to learn how to forgive one another to keep the barriers to communication from preventing intimacy. Your husband will not be able to change significantly without openness, honesty and acceptance developing between both of you. Most important, he must need to know he will not be ‘punished’ for his honesty.


Intimacy also involves commitment and caring. Both of you are committed to the well-being and development of the other. Being caring means you are willing to provide your partner with the sexual experience that pleases him on his terms, in his way and in his time frame. You can ask him what you can do to get him turned on. Maybe you and he can be more open to trying role-playing, sex toys, different lubricants, enjoying erotic movies together, exploring different sexual positions, etc.


Figuring out how things can be done differently is not as difficult as one might think. Recalling your past usual repetitive behavior and to make it a point to do something different no matter how weird or crazy it may be can make it all the more easier. You may not be able to see and get fast results which mean you need to be patient when you try to make any changes.


You can also spice things up by being seductive. You whisper in his ear and tell him all the things you would like to do to him and how it will make you feel. At times, you can seduce your many by playing hard to get as well. Write him an erotic story about you and him. Write your fantasy down and invite him to make it a reality. Show him that you still care about him and that he turns you on. When he does something that does turn you on, tell him that this is what you have been craving. This will boost both is ego and libido a lot if he has performance anxiety problem.


If he is under a lot of stress, try to make him feel relaxed. Give him a neck rub or back massage or play some soothing music to calm him when he gets home.


If you have approached your husband without being demanding and controlling and he is still not willing to be open and honest with you, seeking professional marriage counseling is still a good option even if you end up going by yourself.


There is no one universal solution for boosting your husband’s sexual desire. What you can do is trying to create more love, connection, sexuality, sensuality and affection that will ultimately lead to a more healthy and balanced relationship.


So, do it! Do something today so you and your spouse can be more intimate! If you need some more ideas or ways to get started, you can click on Let’s Do It and Turn Him On

Enhanced by Zemanta

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.