Why Does She Avoid Sex






Find Out From Here On How To Arouse Her


When you are standing in line at the store or in a café, she can be very affectionate. But when in bed, she says she is too tired. When both of you make time to go to bed, sex is always a one-way street, you are the one doing a lot of stroking, caressing and playing with her genitals, trying to get her to reach orgasm. But she has real trouble in getting intimate with you.


A fear of intimacy – hiding behind emotional walls and barriers – is something that affects many adults and prevents them from forming healthy relationship with others.


Here are some reasons why people develop a fear of intimacy and what can be done to close the gap between yourself and the person you love.


(1)   She has fairly strong body image issues


Sometimes a woman’s view of her body can be so poor that she hates seeing herself naked, let alone allowing someone else to see her naked. Some women will do something about this like getting regular exercises and having a proper diet. Others will do nothing but bitch and whine about it and most likely they will have a fear of intimacy.


How to overcome this? One of the things you can do is to basically treat her like she is gorgeous and sexy all the time. You can gently but positively refute all her negative self-doubts. When she is self-conscious about her tummy or wide hips, you just have to say, “You are the hottest woman I have ever dated” and give her this kind of assurance as often as you can. Do not be afraid to grab and caress her tummy or hips just because she has issues over them.


To support what you say, you frequently touch her all over her body, not just during sex but even outside the bedroom. When she is looking or doing some other things, you come up from behind her to rub her tummy or hips. What you are doing is to basically and totally normalize her body and your attraction to it. You have to be patient because this may take a couple of months to change her from someone with crippling body anxiety issues to someone who is very accepting of and comfortable with her body.


(2)   She is afraid of the unknown


Some women can easily open up to men and may have no problem in sleeping with you on the 3rd date. However, some may be unwilling to get intimate even after a couple of months. Maybe she is a virgin, maybe she has had a couple of short-lived relationships, or maybe she is unsure about what lies ahead for the relationship. Perhaps she had been with someone for years and the thought of being with someone totally new, while exciting, scares her. Whatever the reasons, she is one of those people who simply take a longer while to open up, especially where physical intimacy is concerned.


If you share an otherwise mutually satisfying relationship and enjoy being with each other, give her some more time. She may need to feel certain of your love or require a while to feel comfortable with you physically before she can engage in a sexual relationship.


(3)   Unhappy past relationship


Maybe her last boyfriend did not treat her properly (maybe even sexually abused her) or cheated her and this can make her fear intimacy. This fear can prevent her from entering into another close connection. If this is the case, you need to go slow on your sexual advances because being too forceful or trying too hard can backfire. You have to be patient to allow her to heal herself before she can be comfortable with you in an intimate setting. Maybe you can encourage her to talk about her past with you, assuming that she even wants to. By all means, let her know that you find her attractive but will not pressure her into sex. Offer support when she feels scared, confused or depressed.


(4)   She has medical issues


She may be suffering from a condition that is medically defined as hypoactive sexual desire disorder. Signs of this condition include feelings of shame, fear about sexual matters and painful spasm during intercourse, complete emotional detachment during sex. The cause of this condition could be psychological or physical/hormonal.


However, it is important to remember that the absence of a dramatic orgasmic climax during intercourse does not necessarily mean she is suffering from this condition. Sometimes a woman may be concerned about other matters like sexual hygiene or unwanted pregnancy which may prevent her from wanting to be intimate with you and you interpret these as fears of intimacy. Assure her that you will take care of these issues and work together with her to find solutions to them.


For more readings on sexuality matters, you can click Hot Sex and if you need more help for both of you to perform better in bed, you can click How To Improve My Sex Life

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