How To Have The Sex Life You Want

 

 

 

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How to have better sex? How to get in the mood? How to become orgasmic? A good sex life takes time and effort to maintain. It is often due to our busy lives which often leave us tired and devoid of the imagination and motivation required to keep up the pace. If sex with your partner isn’t what it used to be, here are some ways that you can put the spark back in your bedroom.

 

(1)   Communicate your needs to each other

 

Communication is very important in a relationship. This may be uncomfortable to you. But if you do not take this first important step, both of you will have to face with a non-ending unsatisfactory sex life. Do not wait for him or her to ask you what feels good. Tell him or her, what you like most about your sex life. Do not be shy to ask for something new or different. Just be sure that you only bring up such topics when outside of the bedroom, such as during a quiet walk on an evening. In this way, you can talk freely without spoiling an intimate moment.

 

(2)   Add in fantasies and share them with each other

 

Remember that you are a sexual being. Admit it; everyone has at least one major sexual fantasy. Whether you are a naughty doctor or a submissive nurse, it is time to indulge and go wild. One of the biggest factors in a great sex life is being comfortable with your partner. Role-playing offers an excellent way to do so and also to allow you to explore the boundaries of your relationship. It is a harmless way to ease any anxieties both of you may have and keep the mood light.

 

If you are shy to share your erotic fantasies with your partner, afraid of what he or she will think of you, suggest writing an erotic story together one night. Once he or she sees what you have dreamed up for your ‘character’, your partner will definitely know what you have in mind for yourself.

 

(3)   All-day-long foreplay

 

Start foreplay as early as possible before you reach the bedroom because women normally take a bit longer to get hot. Just doing the foreplay a short while before sex may not be enough to get her in the mood.  During the day, do those sweet little things for each other.

 

You can make a date at a restaurant at the end of the day for some fine wining and dining or take a walk at the park. When at home, take a bath together to give you and your partner the chance to touch, rub and scrub each other. After bathing, you can take turns to massage each other for a couple of minutes. By increasing your emotional connection, you can gradually build up the arousal level and increase it right till to the night.

 

(4) Set aside time for sex

 

Better sex will lead to more sex and one of the ways to have it is to make an appointment that neither of you is allowed to cancel. When both of you lead busy lives, sometimes the only way to leave time for sex is to literally put it on your schedule. Lie in bed together for an hour on a weekend morning. You may just chat, or you may engage in ‘bedroom wrestling’. Either way, you are connecting to each other. Though it is just once a week, but an hour or two of sexual activity can be energizing and pleasurable for both of you.

 

(5)   Make it fun

 

Sex is supposed to be fun. The more fun you make it, the more enjoyable it will be. Bring an item into the bedroom, like a board game, which can force you to think about how you are going to use this item to make the experience different. Or, it can be those innocent games, such as truth or dare and spin the bottle. Use these games to reignite the passion. You can trade game points for a 3-minute sexual favors which can be a massage, kissing, oral sex, talking dirty, a dance, a striptease and anything you want. The game is all about teasing which gives you the structure to add in anything that you want sexually. Besides games, you can add in toys and experiment with sexy lingerie, or anything that creates a special mood for you.

 

(6)   Increase her chances of having an orgasm

 

Many women do not have orgasm during intercourse because they do not get sufficient clitoral stimulation in the normal missionary position. What you can do is to get into those positions that can allow greater clitoral contact, such as woman-on-top position. When she is on top, you can stroke her clitoris which is what she needs to have an orgasm. At all times, observe how she reacts when a particular body part is being touched and spend more time on those areas which are highly sensitive for her.

 

For more tips on how to have better sex, read on further at Hot Sex and  Eternal Flame

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