How Can I Last Longer Without The Need To Take Viagra




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Do you want to have a good time in bed? Do you know that life energy and sexual energy are quite closely related?  Just imagine if you cannot walk up a flight of stairs without panting away, how are you going to have energy and stamina to handle the physical strains put on the body by sexual activity?


Can you ever really look your best in bed and outside the bedroom when you are tense, nervous or stressed? Certainly not. But no one can live a stress-free life. Stress is a cumulative process. The small daily stress can add up gradually and eventually overwhelm you. As a result, when you get out of balance both physically and emotionally, sex drive will take a dive.


Are you angry at your spouse or partner? At yourself? Do you feel anxious about having sex? The most efficient way to relieve stress and reduce anxiety is by exercising. It can help to stimulate the production of endorphins which are a kind of feel-good hormone in your brain that can increase your sex drive and make your orgasms stronger. You do not need to be a super athlete, but basic physical health will improve your sexual functioning.


Exercise can help you look good and studies have shown that adults who are fit have a more active sex life than those with sedentary lifestyle. Exercise and sex have a lot in common. Both causes you to sweat, promote blood circulation, burn calories, relieve stress and make you feel good. When you start to improve your body, you will like yourself better and have more confidence. You will then be more attractive to opposite sex.


Exercise not only enhances your sexual desire but also makes it more enjoyable and satisfying. It increases the level of testosterone in both men and women thereby ensuring better sex life. If you are experiencing low libido, it is time to stop accepting it and start exercising.


The strength training of the large muscle groups in the legs, back and chest can stimulate the release of testosterone in both men and women, which increases libido. This is especially true if you get into the habit of lifting weights. By working out at least 3 times a week, you will receive both physical and mental benefits that will help your overall sexual attractiveness. Sex also requires you to hold occasionally unusual positions for short periods of time, so conditioning your body by way of muscular endurance exercises (such as weight training) can help a lot for longer lasting sex.


For enthusiastic sex, you need to build cardio endurance and energy levels by exercising regularly and practicing alternate days of aerobics, strength training and stretching. Try stretching after your workouts or incorporate a little yoga into your routine. Stretching exercise can improve your body flexibility which can enhance your sex life by making it a bit easier for you to get into your favorite position with a minimum of fuss.


Men need to exercise for their cardiovascular health in order to experience a sustained erection. Studies show that men with erectile dysfunction (ED) could be at risk for cardiovascular disease like heart attack and stroke. The most recent of those studies, published in the journal Mayo Clinic Proceedings in 2009, showed that ED may predict future heart disease. The 1,400 men who took part in that study had never been diagnosed with heart disease. But over the next decade, men with ED were 80% more likely to develop heart disease than men without ED.


To keep up the habit of regular exercising, it will be a great idea to do this together with your spouse or partner. Exercising with your spouse will not only have a positive impact on one another’s health, but for your sex life too. Doing things together can improve both emotional and sexual intimacy.


Now that you understand the importance of regular exercise which can provide you with more energy, especially when it comes to sex. The increased stamina that you can gain can be used to provide women with an incredible sexual experience.


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How To Face Up To Differences In Sex Drive




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Do you feel pressured because your partner wants more sex than you? Do you feel neglected because your partner refuses to make love as often as you want to? If this sounds familiar, you are definitely not alone. In fact practically any couple who has been together for any real length of time experience different level of sexual desire.


However sexual incompatibility need not mean the end of an otherwise good relationship. If you are willing to reassess your attitudes, negotiate your sexual needs and talk about your sex lives in an honest and respectful way, you can reclaim the intimacy and closeness that is weakening in your relationship.


How serious is the low libido problem?


One survey revealed that 33.4% of women and 15.5% of men reported lack of sexual interest. Though losing interest in sex may not be as common an occurrence for men as it is for women, but when men lose interest in sex, it scares them a lot more because their masculinity is so linked to their sexuality.


Loss of libido also makes men more likely to be unhappy about the rest of their lives than it does for women. Only 23% of men with loss of libido say they still feel very happy about life in general versus 46% of women.


Libido loss does not usually happen suddenly. It is a gradual process. When most relationships first begin there is high degree of passion and sexual frequency. Sex often happens effortlessly and spontaneously and desire feels mutual due to the newness of discovering one another as well as the newness of the relationship. After about 18 months, this new-found excitement and intrigue begins to wane and different sexual patterns can start to emerge. It can feel confusing and disheartening and you may question whether you are sexually compatible or if you still love your partner.


Desire fluctuates for a variety of reasons. Stress, fatigue, depression, performance anxiety, erectile dysfunction, certain types of medication and ill-health can all contribute to problems. Hormonal changes can cause loss of libido and any underlying resentment or anger towards your partner will also interfere with your motivation to be intimate.


What to avoid?


One of the most damaging mistakes you can do is to blame one another for the different levels of sexual interest. Often the person with the lower sex drive is being targeted as the main cause of the problem. This can cause the accused person to get defensive and this can lead to greater sexual frustration.


How to face up to low libido


An important step is to acknowledge that both of you are different people with different levels of desire. After all, if your desires to eat, sleep, socialize, or exercise is unlikely to be perfectly matched with your partner’s, the same can also happen to your sex drive. Both also need to take responsibility for addressing this issue and making the necessary changes and adjustments.


It can be a bit embarrassing to talk about your sex lives and to clarify with your partner about what turn you on and what do not, but it is critical in re-establishing and maintaining a satisfying sex life. Couples experiencing desire discrepancy are encouraged to negotiate their likes and dislikes or to look for ways to compromise. Do not compare your sex life to anyone else or what you see in porn. What matters most is what is right for you as a couple.


In dealing with marital anger as a cause of low libido, you can either consider couples therapy or a real heart-to-heart talk. But in the meantime, it may be possible to jump-start your sex life. How to do it?


Well, just do it! A common misconception about sex is that we should get into the mood first before we do it. However the professional view is that if we keep waiting for the desire to come, some of us would never have sex again. It is sometimes important to just have sex even if you are not in the mood. Once you start, desire and arousal often follow. Do not let the time between sex drags on for too long.


Of course, it is most important that this has to happen under the situation when mutual feelings of kindness and respect already exist in the relationship. In this way you will be able to be open to your partner and experience sex as an act of love rather than a performance or just going through the motion.


It is also important to shift our attitudes towards sex by treating it as not just erections, orgasms and penetration and. Instead it should be regarded as a source of pleasure and intimacy. In meeting each other’s needs, you have to accept that you may get less sex than you ideally like and have to look for other ways to feel emotionally and physically close.


The bottom-line here is not about getting more sex, but getting better. Frequency should not be the sole measure of libido. Feelings count too. How you feel about the whole lovemaking process should be the true measure of whether your libido is healthy.


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Does Low Libido Mean Impotence




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One in five men does not want sex? How can that be true? What defines a low libido? What is behind low sexual desire? What is the difference between impotence and low libido?


What Is The Difference Between Impotence And Low Libido


Impotence and loss of libido are 2 separate issues. However, men who suffer impotence normally experience a decrease in libido over time. When libido drops and impotence, or erectile dysfunction, is not a problem, there are many causes for this.


Causes Of Low Sex Drive


Aging plays a role, though some older men have a strong interest in sex, sex drive generally decreases with age.


Psychological issues – stress and anxiety from the strain of daily life, relationship or family problems, depression and mental disorders can affect sexual desire. Performance anxiety and premature ejaculation can also hurt sex drive. According to some research studies, almost one in three men reported premature ejaculation while less than one in five were worried about performance.


Paradoxically, too much closeness in a relationship can also sap libido. Some men who after seeing the way their wives experiencing labor pain or witnessed the whole process of giving birth in the delivery room, find it difficult to eroticize the mother of their children. If they also help in the care of the baby or young children, the resulting exhaustion can sap libido for men as surely as it does for women.


Medical problems – diseases such as diabetes; conditions such as obesity, high blood pressure and high cholesterol; some hair-loss remedies, anti-depressants, tranquilizers and other medications can adversely affect sexual desire.


Hormonal causes – testosterone level dips as men age and this means low sexual desire. Other hormones can play a role too such as low levels of thyroid hormone or, in certain rare cases, high levels of prolactin, a hormone produced in a gland at the base of the brain.


How To Cope With Low Sex Drive


Each cause of low sexual desire has its own treatment. When the root cause is due to low testosterone, men can take testosterone supplements.


If a prescription medicine hampers a man’s sex drive, he should ask his doctor about the possibility of swapping the medication with a similar-functioning one that does not cause sexual side effects.


When men improve their health through regular exercise and a low-fat diet, their libido is likely to increase.


In cases of stress due to work, or any other area of your life, you have to re-prioritize your activities.


Some problems such as depression or anxiety, intense job stress, family worries, serious marital conflicts, experiences of past abuse, or conflicts about sexual orientation may require professional assistance. In these cases, you need to seek professional help if the negative feelings interfere with the rest of your life that you can no longer able to experience pleasure.


Once the more obvious causes for a man’s low libido have been eliminated – prescribed medications, drug or alcohol abuse, or low testosterone – couple must work through discrepancies in their relationship to arrive at a solution.


For couples who have been together for a long time, anger or shouting matches with your partner can hurt sex drive. If you can work on your differences through couple therapy or some long, honest talks, good feelings will be restored and sex drive is likely to return to normal level.


Frequency of sexual activity is not the best measure of sexual interest. Some couples need not feel they have to have sex a certain number of times a week to have a good sex life. It is all about compatibility. It is about how happy the person next to you is in bed. Providing that makes you happy, too.


The advice here is not so much about getting more, but getting better. Feelings count too. If you look forward to sex and feel good about it before, during and after, that is the true measure of whether your libido is healthy.


Dissatisfaction with their sex lives affects about 15% to 16% of men. If you are one of them, this is not something you have to live with. There is much you can do to improve your sex life and your happy outlook in life. Read on more from Hot Sex and Overcome Low Libido

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Causes Of Low Female Libido And How To Overcome This

Low libido in women or low sexual desire is the most common sexual problem affecting at least one-third of women. Some women are much distressed over this loss of libido, feeling as if they are letting their partners down. However there are many things women can do to rekindle their passion and bring pleasure back in their sex lives.


What can cause the loss of libido in women?


(1)   Psychological issues


Fear of pregnancy can hurt sex drive. This is especially so in those Roman Catholic societies where the church frowns on contraceptives and abortion. Problems with physical or mental health, medication, recreational drug abuse, past sexual abuse and daily life stress are other factors.


(2)   Negative views on sex


Double standards on sex can have a big effect on women’s sexual desire. Men are looked at as studs if they are sexual, but women are still being called sluts. Some of us are being fed with some negative sex beliefs such as sex is dirty or immoral, or should only be used for procreation. All these negative views can kill sex drive.


(3)   Biological factors


Hormonal fluctuations due to pregnancy, breast-feeding and pre-menopause syndrome can lessen sexual desire. Vaginal dryness which can result from declining estrogen levels can make sex painful and cause loss of libido. Testosterone level also affects libido in women which normally peaks in their mid-20s and declines from there until menopause.


(4)   Relationship problems


What happens outside the bedroom will eventually set the mood inside the bedroom. Conflict in other parts of the relationship can affect sex life. Differences over monetary matters, child rearing, and relationship with in-laws can result in anger, resentment and cause women to mentally shut out sex.


How to rekindle the passion?


(1)   Focusing on own needs


The thing that can most inhibit desire in women is to be too concerned about others at the expense of own interests and comfort. If women want to enjoy sex and have orgasm, they need to pander to their own needs and to do the things that can pleasure themselves.


(2)   Improving intimacy


Before looking for ways to spice up sex life, it helps to work on improving the intimate connection first. Studies have proven that a simple touch can help to release endorphins in the brain that not only make us feel loved, but want to give love in return. Surprise her with an unexpected hug, a surprisingly romantic or a naughty tickling.


(3)   Injecting some novelty


Marriage life inevitably sinks into boredom and hurts libido if both gets too comfortable with routine. Change the place and time to have sex, experience with different sex positions, and create a conducive mood for sex in the bedroom, living room, kitchen or just anywhere you can imagine. Try role playing to be someone or something else, dress up and play sexy games with your partner. Do something different or adventurous outside of the bedroom as well. Consider watching horror movies, riding a roller coaster, or doing bungee jump, trying an exotic cuisine with your partner in a newly opened restaurant.


(4)   Stimulating yourself


It can be pressurizing for some women to have orgasm with their partners. A way to overcome this is to engage in masturbation. This process can help a woman to discover what and how she can be aroused. After knowing what feels good, you can guide your partner in how he can please you sexually.


(5)   Using lubricants


If vaginal dryness is a problem, go to a local pharmacy or sex shop where you can choose the different flavors and aromas of lubricants. Applying estrogen cream into the vagina can help to increase vaginal secretions. If possible, you can discuss with your doctor about the options before trying anything.


(6)   Having realistic expectations


What you often see in porn movies is usually not an accurate reflection of reality and can be exaggerating at times. If sometimes you cannot have orgasm during sex, it can be due to some temporary factors and is not due to your fault. If you are concerned about how you look when naked that you want to make love with lights off, you are probably too harsh in evaluating your own body. Your partner probably finds you more attractive than you think you are. So you should relax, be kinder to yourself, just enjoy the process of lovemaking and gradually your libido will return.


(7)   Having a deep conversation


You should not expect your partner to be able to read your mind like a book all the time. If you want pleasure during sex, the simplest way is to let your partner knows what arouses you. Put your request in a compliment rather than a complaint. For example, you can say, “It really turns me on when you take your time on foreplay before we have sex.” For discussions on sex, it is better for this to take place outside of the bedroom to avoid been too pressurizing to both sides.


All strong relationships require communication, effort and a little commitment to spice things up. If you want help to make your love life interesting and satisfying again, you can click on Hot Sex and Get Her In Mood.

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Relationship Improvement – 10 Effective Communication Tips

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Getting along with your partner or spouse is not just about sex. Communication plays a very important part in every relationship. Poor communication skills can be a source of anger and low libido for a relationship. On the other hand, effective communication serves as a springboard to a stronger relationship and better sex life. The next time, when any conflict occurs, keep these tips on effective communication skills in mind and you can get a more positive outcome and an improvement in sexual intimacy.


(1)   Focusing on the present


Sometimes you may be tempted to dig up certain past issues and lump them up to your current ones. However, doing so will only complicate matters and hinder both sides’ abilities to come up with solutions. Therefore, you should stay focused on the present, try to understand each other’s view points to facilitate the finding of solutions.


(2)   Paying attention


People often make this mistake of only wanting others to listen to them but are not interested in hearing what others are talking. Communication can only be effective if it happens in both directions. When you keep talking, you will tend to listen less. At certain point in time, it is better to stop talking and start listening in order to gain a better understanding of your partner’s views.


(3)   Trying to put yourself in his/her position


Often problems arise when we talk only from our point of view and spend a lot of time and effort in trying to get the other person to see things our way. This can only make the other person feel that you do not care about him or her. It facilitates the coming up of better solutions to your conflict if you can try to put yourself in his/her position to understand how he/she reaches his/her view points.


(4)   Empathizing his/her feelings


It is easy to feel hurt and get defensive when someone criticizes you. While criticism can often be unbearable, it is important to listen to the other person’s pain and respond with empathy for his/her feelings. Listen carefully to differentiate what is true in what he/she is saying can help you to discover the roots of the conflict.


(5)   Taking responsibility for your actions


Effective communication requires the courage to admit your mistakes when you are wrong. This can help to diffuse the tension and inspire the other person to respond in kind. This will lead you both to a solution as well as better understanding of each other.


(6)   Beginning with what you are going to say with “I”


Instead of saying things like, “You mess things up,” begin your statements like, “I feel ……..” This will make your tone less accusing and provoke less defensiveness. By changing the way you talk, you can help the other person understand your point of view without him/her feeling attacked.


(7)   Working towards a compromise


It is unrealistic in trying to get everything to work in your way. You have to “arrive at somewhere in the middle” to meet certain portions of each other’s needs. This approach is much more effective than you getting what you want at the expense of the other person. Healthy communication involves coming out with a win-win solution for both sides.


(8)   Taking time to cool off


Sometimes tempers can get heated up so much that it becomes pointless to talk further. When this happens, it is better to step back for a while to let each side cool down first. Sometimes good communication means knowing when to keep quiet.


(9)   Keeping a positive attitude


If you can approach the situation with a constructive attitude, mutual respect and a willingness to take into consideration each other’s point of view or at least making an effort to come out with a solution, you can make progress towards the goal of a resolution to the conflict. Unless you want to throw in the towel on your relationship, you should not give up on communication.


(10) Seeking a 3rd party help if you need it


If one or both of you have trouble in reaching out to each other or if the situation shows no signs of improving, it will be better to seek the help of a professionally trained 3rd party. A family counselor will be in the best position to work out some feasible solutions and offer you and your spouse some skill training to resolve future conflict. If your partner does not want to accompany you to meet the counselor, you can still benefit from this professional help and advice.


Effective communication requires mutual understanding and respect and willing to adopt a give and take approach in coming up with solutions. If you are looking for more ideas to improve your love life, you can click on to Hot Sex and Eternal Flame

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