The Truth about Vaginismis and How You Can Achieve Sexual Intimacy Again




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Women with Vaginismus often think that they are “too small” and that their vagina needs to be stretched. Just imagining this is painful!  Such misinformation concerning Vaginismis, if left uncorrected, can lead to a wide range of misguided beliefs about Vaginismis. These misconceptions will result in wrong diagnosis and delay in undergoing therapy.


To get back your sex drive it helps to have a better understanding about Vaginismus so that you will not allow the following inaccurate sayings that prevent you from choosing the best option or treatment for your condition.


1. Vaginismis is totally a psychological issue: This is certainly among the most typical misguided beliefs concerning Vaginismis. Regardless that Vaginismis is more of a psychological problem; it has a physical aspect connected to it. The pain experienced by a girl is real and not just in her head and it certainly causes huge distress for the woman during intercourse.

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2. It is an uncommon condition: Vaginismus is a much more common problem than people realize. The myth exists due to the embarrassment that surrounds the condition and not wanting to tell anyone.  In fact, this is the single major cause of unconsummated marriage/sex. The reality and truth of the matter is that so many others suffer with this “common” condition and for those finding out about it for the first time and reading this, please know that you are not alone and there is a “cure” for this condition.


3. A female with Vaginismis isn’t interested about sex: It is an additional misunderstanding about females with Vaginismis. Nevertheless, this is not the truth. Many women with Vaginismis are sexually responsive and want to have intercourse with their companions. They avoid intimacy simply because they are scared of the pain while having sex due to Vaginismis.

4. She has to seek treatment from a therapist: There exists a general misconception that only an experienced sex therapist can help a female to cure Vaginismis. The truth is this isn’t so. A woman can eliminate Vaginismis better if she self-treats on her own by inserting dilators into her vagina regularly at her own pace because she herself is the only one that is more aware of the seriousness of the issue than any physical or sex therapist.


5. Vaginismus cannot reoccur: There is no scientific research that once cured, Vaginismis cannot reoccur. Therefore, it not true that a woman will not suffer from Vaginismis again if she has been successfully cured of this problem before. However, she will be equipped with all of the knowledge and techniques, which can help her to get rid of Vaginismis if it reoccurs.


6. Hormonal deficiency will cause Vaginismis: Here also, there is no study to prove that Vaginismis is caused by a hormone deficiency. Hence, this is likewise one of the many myths that females have about Vaginismis. Nevertheless, in some instances, in more mature females hormonal changes do bring about menopause which cause their vagina to get a little bit drier. This can contribute to pain while having intercourse.


7. It heals following child delivery: Even though child delivery assists you to loosen the vaginal muscles, it is highly improbable that Vaginismis heals following child delivery. Therefore, don’t be too complacent into believing that you may be able to cure Vaginismis after you have given birth to a child. It is important to remember that childbirth does not address nor cure the fear and apprehension associated with vaginal penetration nor does childbirth reduce the spasm related to vaginismus. This must be addressed separately.


8. Single women cannot cure Vaginismis: This is actually the most commonly seen myth that people have got with regards to Vaginismis. Nevertheless, the reality is, women that are single can likewise eliminate Vaginismis if they show some determination and commitment and work consistently towards implementing the treatment process.


9. Vaginismus is due to a woman being ‘too small’ or she has a thick hymen or her partner is just ‘too big’.  Many women mistakenly believe or are actually told that vaginismus is caused by her being ‘too small’ or this is because she has a thick hymen or her partner is well-endowed. When in reality, it is caused by the subconscious tightening of the vaginal muscles irrespective of his or her size or anything to do with the presence or absence of the hymen.


Learn How To Completely Cure Vaginismis HERE!

These are some of the common myths, which women have with regards to Vaginismis. If you are also suffering from Vaginismis, it is necessary for you not to live under these myths regarding Vaginismis. It is only when you have a better understanding of your issues that you can treat Vaginismis easily and quickly.


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Vaginismus: Types, Causes and Treatment



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A common reason that many women avoid sexual intimacy is because it is painful. If a woman suffering from painful intercourse experiences involuntary tightening of the vagina during foreplay or penetrative sex, she is likely to suffer from Vaginismus.  This tightening is caused by the involuntary contraction of the pelvic muscles making intercourse almost impossible. This article will cover the different types of Vaginismus, their causes and treatments.


If you are likewise being affected by Vaginismus then it is necessary for you to know the type of Vaginismus you have developed. It is far better to verify if you have got primary or secondary Vaginismus simply because it can help you in eliminating the problem more efficiently and also at a faster pace. Read on.


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Primary Vaginismus

Primary vaginismus is the name given to the condition for those who have encountered pain and discomfort while having sexual intercourse for the first time or never been able to put in anything at all into your vagina.

Primary vaginismus is often discovered in the teenage years, when the girl tries to use tampons, or goes for an internal examination and finds it to be extremely uncomfortable. This fear of pain then causes an anxiety which will bring with it the conditioned reflex response of closing up whenever the woman then subsequently attempt intercourse. This is the major reason for women being unable to consummate their marriages, or participate in sexual relationships.


The causes for this form of Vaginismus are emotional and also physical. The physical reasons include things like unfortunate past sexual experiences such as rape or sexual mistreatment, strict sexual upbringing, strong family religious overtones, fears of first-time sex, exposure to sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.
Occurrence: This type is much more frequent in girls within the age group of 15-25 because this is the years when young ladies or women have sexual intercourse for the very first time or attempt placing tampons in their vagina.


Secondary Vaginismus

If you were earlier able to have normal pain-free sexual intercourse but something happens that causes pain with penetration, then it suggests that you may be affected by secondary Vaginismus.

The reasons behind this kind of Vaginismus are mainly physical and includes yeast infections, intense strain to vagina for the duration of child delivery, trauma to the pelvic area, hysterectomy, radiation or menopause and other stuff that cause strain to the vaginal canal or the vaginal opening.
This discomfort or pain that happens during intercourse appears to initiate an avoidance reflex that causes spasm of the vaginal muscles. This is the bodies attempt to say ‘no’ to vaginal penetration to protect itself from pain.
Occurrence of Secondary Vaginismus: This type is more frequent in ladies in the age-group of 25-50.

Treatment solution for Primary and Secondary Vaginismus

The treatment of these two kinds of Vaginismus is practically the same. If you are affected by Secondary Vaginismus, you will go through the same physical and also the psychological treatment methods used to remedy Primary Vaginismus.


These types of cures comprise of counseling about sexual intercourse, behavior therapy, Kegel exercise routines (contraction and relaxation of the pelvic muscles), sensate focus routines (a series of specific exercises for couples which encourage each partner to take turns paying increased attention to their own senses), vaginal dilation, and Botox injection and so on.


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Other supporting therapies include Hypnotherapy (using exercises to bring about deep relaxation, intense concentration and focused attention to achieve a heightened state of awareness, also known as a trance); Acupressure (involves placing physical pressure, by hand, elbow, or with the aid of various devices, on different pressure points on the surface of the body), as well as others may also be used to treat both of these types of Vaginismus.


The Time Taken to Treat Primary and Secondary Vaginismus

The time-span in which a female is able to eradicate her disorder may vary a little bit. This is for the reason that a woman with the secondary type of Vaginismus may have a slight possibility of recovering quicker and sooner than the person struggling with primary Vaginismus; as the capability of the lady with secondary Vaginismus to have painless intercourse in the past can help her in fixing her condition fast.


Other factors such as the overall well-being of the female, the Vaginismus treatment method, her commitment and dedication towards completing the therapy routine and support from her partner can also play an important role in determining the length of time that the female should be able to cure her disorder.


Hope this will help you to have a better understanding of the 2 kinds of Vaginismus, which affects many women. If left untreated, Vaginismus can have adverse effects on your sexual life and can also end an unconsummated romantic relationship.


To obtain improved treatment for Vaginismus, it is very important for you to understand the specific type of Vaginismus that affects you and take the necessary methods to get rid of the disorder by starting a treatment program. The top treatment plan that you should undergo to beat the disorder of Vaginismus is the one that suits you most so that you can get rid of the problem at your own pace and without adding more stress to you.


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A Pain You Can’t Ignore When Having Sex





For many women the difficulties linked to sex can be hard to talk about. When sex hurts, a lot of women think about whether the pain actually is in their head or if there is something they are doing completely wrong when they have intercourse. They are totally bewildered because they do not know why they are suffering from painful intercourse. For anybody who is suffering from pain during intercourse it is important to understand the factors which might be the cause of your hurtful sex.

Listed here are a few of the major factors that cause painful intercourse:

1) Vaginismus

It is among the leading cause of painful sex. In Vaginismus, the muscles around the vagina tighten involuntarily whenever there is an attempt to penetrate it.   This tensing can make any sort of sexual intercourse agonizing. Thus, a woman being affected by Vaginismus encounters a lot of soreness while having sexual intercourse. The symptoms can vary from one woman to the next. Some women are unable to insert anything into their vagina because it closes up completely, some women can insert a tampon but are unable to have sex, and others are able to have sex but find it very painful.


What Are the Causes of Vaginismus


A number of things can cause vaginismus, although it is not fully understood why the condition happens.


For some women, it may be caused by a traumatic past experience, such as a difficult childbirth or sexual abuse. They may associate sexual activity with pain and avoid having intercourse as a way of preventing further pain.


A condition called vestibulodynia is a very common cause of vaginismus. It is thought to be caused by oversensitive nerves at the opening of the vagina, and causes pain or discomfort when penetration is attempted. Some women with vestibulodynia also experience pain when using tampons.


Vaginismus can also sometimes be caused by inflammation or an injury to the vagina or vulva.
Treatment for Vaginismus

Treatment usually combines counseling, education, and muscle exercises.

Kegel exercises cause the repetitive contraction and relaxation of the pelvic muscles. The exercises can help improve control over the vaginal muscles.

Vaginal dilation exercises use the patient’s own fingers or plastic instruments called dilators. The dilators are gradually increased in size and placed in the vagina over time. Women may be asked to practice Kegel exercises while the dilators are in the vagina.

Once patients have reached a certain tolerance, sexual intercourse is attempted. Patients may be asked to place the dilators themselves, but the program is supervised by a healthcare provider.

Fear of sex is a large part of this disorder, so educating women is an important part of treatment. Women are taught about sex organs and how they work. The sexual response cycle and common sex myths are also discussed.

Depending on the cause, psychological counseling is often central to the treatment of vaginismus, particularly primary vaginismus due to sexual abuse or trauma. When treated by a specialist in sex therapy, success rates are generally very high.


2) Pelvic Inflammatory Disorder (PID)

Pelvic inflammatory disorder (or disease) is an infection of a woman’s pelvic organs including the uterus (womb), Fallopian tubes (tubes), ovaries, and cervix.  It is also one of the main causes of hurtful sex, which affects women of all ages. Apart from bringing about soreness during sex, in addition, it causes vaginal discharge, hurtful urination and stomach discomfort. The development of PID can take several months and a girl may not realize that she has developed PID till it advances and brings about painfulness in the whole pelvic region, for the duration of or after sex.

Reasons behind Pelvic Inflammatory Disorder (PID)


Pelvic inflammatory disease develops as the result of spread of a sexually transmitted disease. Most cases of pelvic inflammatory disease are caused by gonorrhea and/or Chlamydia. Young, sexually active women with multiple sex partners are at greatest risk for pelvic inflammatory disease.

Treatment Solution for Pelvic Inflammatory Disorders (PID)

Treatments for Pelvic Inflammatory disorder generally involves an antibiotic treatment or an antibiotic shot in the pelvic region. In some severe cases, a physician can also recommend surgery. Of course it is best to get the opinion of a respected doctor before going through any treatment for PID.


We have looked at some of the major factors behind painful intercourse, which when not dealt with can spoil your love life. Aside from Vaginismus and PID, you will also find a number of other hurtful sex factors which include Vulvodynia, Endometriosis, Ovarian growths and others, that cause pain while having intercourse.


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Do You Get Pain during Intercourse?




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Why is it hurting during intercourse? It might be Vaginismus!


Making love is supposed to be a happy and enjoyable experience and if it is painful it means that there is something completely wrong. Pain during sex is definitely distressing for you.  This distress may well make you tighten up down below. This tightening-up may cause the pain to get worse next time.


Unfortunately, painful intercourse can often have a destructive emotional effect on a relationship. Sometimes couples split up because of it. So that is a clear reason why you should get the problem sorted out as soon as possible.


What is the key reason why is it hurting during intercourse? Generally there are a great number of causes behind painful intercourse; however the most common one, of which impacts a lot of women, is Vaginismus. We will take a look at this unique sexual disorder in a bit more detail to ensure you will be able to really know what Vaginismus exactly is and the way it is a primary root cause of painful sexual intercourse.


What is Vaginismus


Vaginismus is a spasm of the vaginal muscles (PC muscles), caused mainly by fear of being hurt. A woman who is suffering from Vaginismus goes through pain while putting anything right into her vagina. This is caused by the reflex of the Pubococcygeus (PC) muscles. The reflex of these muscles inside the vagina brings about the tightening up of the vagina and makes it almost impossible to have full sex or even to use tampons.


The different types of Vaginismus


There are fundamentally two forms of Vaginismus; the Primary Vaginismus and the Secondary Vaginismus which affects women within different periods in their lifetime. Let’s have a look at each of these different types of Vaginismus.


Primary Vaginismus is when the condition has always been present. It mainly occurs to girls in the age of 15-25 years. This kind of Vaginismus affects girls that have a very terrible sexual history (abuse or rape in the past), or they have had a restrictive upbringing where they got various false impressions or negative thoughts usually from their parents about sex and vagina, which can cause them to have phobia of sexual intercourse.


Secondary Vaginismus is less common and occurs in women who were before able to have pain free intercourse. It primarily happens as a consequence of physical strain caused to the vagina such as in the course of delivering a child or while going through surgical treatment. This type of experience is likely to make the woman affected develop Vaginismus as a protective reaction.


Occasionally, Vaginismus occurs secondarily due to having some painful gynaecological condition – such as endometriosis or postmenopausal vaginitis. It can also be triggered by medical conditions, traumatic events, relationship issues, surgery, life-changes (e.g. menopause) or for no apparent reason.


So, in such cases, these woman who have had many years of pain-free intercourse will have developed a conditioned response resulting in ongoing, involuntary vaginal tightness with attempts at intercourse.


How common is Vaginismus?


Although the prevalence of Vaginismus in the general population appears low, it is the most commonly encountered cause for painful intercourse. Women with Vaginismus tend to be very embarrassed about it and do not mention it to anyone. Many women have mild degrees of it at some point in their lives. Vaginismus can vary from mild discomfort with intercourse to the man being unable to enter because of pain and spasm. There are many couples who have been together for years but have never had intercourse because of Vaginismus.


Vaginismus is a complicated sexual problem


There are lots of difficulties involved in Vaginismus. As stated previously, this is due to the involuntary response of the PC muscles. Because this is a psychological condition, the origins of the disorder lie in the mind. This is not due to the woman’s fault. She does not intentionally ’cause’ or direct her body to tighten and cannot simply make it stop. Due to this reason it confuses a woman a lot as she cannot understand what precisely is wrong and this is the major reason why females aren’t able to understand why it is hurting during intercourse.


I sincerely hope this has made it easy to answer your question pertaining to for what reason is it hurting during intercourse. If you are seriously having serious pain during intercourse, it is recommended for you to seek advice from a gynecologist or a sex therapist and go through the different Vaginismus treatment plans that are offered to get rid of this condition as quickly as possible.


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When Sex Is Painful Or Uncomfortable




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If sex is painful to her, it is certainly not pleasurable. This will make it difficult to engage in regular sexual intercourse which is important to your overall health.


Both physiological and psychological factors can cause uncomfortable sex or painful sex in men and women.


There are a number of conditions that can lead to discomfort or pain during sexual intercourse.


(1) Health problems


For men and women, irritation, inflammation, or infection of the genitals can cause discomfort or pain during sexual intercourse. In women, soaps, vaginal sprays and douches can irritate the vulva and lead to uncomfortable sex. Some women are allergic to chemicals in hygiene products, dyes, perfumes, lubricants or to some objects that are placed in the vagina. Conditions such as vaginitis, endometriosis and pelvic inflammatory disease can also cause painful sex in women. In men, infections such as prostatitis can make sex painful or uncomfortable.


(2) Psychological factors


Emotions play an important part in both men’s and women’s ability to enjoy sex. In women, fear, guilt, stress, anxiety and the emotional toll of negative sexual experiences can wreak havoc on sexual desire. These can lead to vaginal dryness when normal vaginal lubrication does not occur. When a woman is anxious, there is insufficient blood flow so she will have dryness. In men, the same emotions can lead to pain during sexual intercourse.


(3) Vaginal dryness


Vaginal dryness can result from certain medications (allergy and cold medications), changes in hormones (decrease in estrogen levels during menopause, perimenopause, after childbirth, or during breastfeeding), health conditions (cancer treatments such as chemotherapy and radiation to the pelvis), psychological issues (insufficient arousal) and other conditions (uterus abnormality, a mass in the pelvis, a disease of the bowel or bladder, scar tissue,or cysts on the ovaries).


How To Cope With Uncomfortable Or Painful Sex


(1) Go for a thorough medical checkup


Rather than trying to second guess or making wild guesses about the causes of painful sex, it is better to play safe to see a gynaecologist to ascertain the real causes. Your doctor can go over your medical history and medications to look for possible causes of your discomfort. In some cases, doctors can recommend localized treatments such as vaginal estrogen inserts.


(2) Use lubricants or moisturizers


There are a wide range of lubricants that can help vaginal dryness. They include silicone-based and water-based products. They can add moisture to the vagina and help make sex more comfortable for both partners.


Avoid using oil-based lubricants such as petroleum jelly, mineral oils and massage oils which can damage condoms and put her at higher risk for sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy. Some women may be allergic to oil-based lubricants and find them irritating to the skin.


Over-the-counter vaginal moisturizers can also be an effective way to minimize vaginal dryness over several days with one application. Moisturizing agents help introduce water into the vaginal tissue.


(3) Discuss with your partner


It is important to talk with your partner about what arouses you and what problems you are facing in sexual intercourse. Sexual excitement causes the secretion of vaginal fluids. An adequate amount of foreplay and vaginal stimulation before intercourse will give the vagina the time and motivation to naturally lubricate itself. You can also experiment with some sex positions (such as the woman-on-top) that can reduce the chances of vaginal tears and abrasions. In some cases, emotional problems (such as past sexual abuses) that are interfering with your sex life can be managed by working with a sex therapy counselor who can help you pinpoint the causes and come up with solutions to make sexual intercourse more comfortable.


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